Worry is one of the most damaging of all human emotions. But unlike anger or joy, it’s not right out there in the open. It lurks in the shadows. It’s stealth-like, insidious ... not unlike water torture.
Worry is not piercing, not crushing; it’s just that constant drip, drip, drip. Nagging, unrelenting. Worriers are forever forecasting the future in terms of doom and gloom and concentrating on what could happen.
Worry plays with your imagination, too. Like a magnifying glass, worry exaggerates the size and scope of the issue. Worry makes problems appear to be larger than they really are.
Worry is a learned behavior. We were not born worrying. We’ve learned to worry from past experiences and from watching others worry, probably our parents. Anxious parents raise anxious kids. But that’s good news, because if worry can be learned, then it can be unlearned, too.
The first thing you must do to unlearn this behavior is to realize that worry is a big waste because it doesn’t change anything. Worry cannot control the future or change the past. It can’t pay a bill, solve a problem or cure an ill. But it can throw you into a kind of emotional paralysis. Worry is like trying to carry around a very heavy load.
The good news is there are practical ways you can wipe worrying from your life:
1. Designate one 15-minute period of time in the day to worry. As worries come up during the day, jot them down but do not worry about them. You’ll have time to do that later.
2. Take control of your mind. You choose what you will think about. When negative thoughts crowd your mind, send them away. Find something to do with your hands that will break your train of thought. Refuse to allow those worries to enter your mind, except during your official worry time.
3. When it’s time for your Special Worry Time, drop everything you are doing. Find a quiet place where you can concentrate all of your efforts on your problems, and all the things you’re just sure could happen or will happen. Now pour your heart into it and worry, worry, worry, worry without ceasing for a full 15 minutes. Do not allow thoughts of peace, joy or happiness to invade this special worry time. Get it all out, and when the 15 minutes are up, stop! No more worrying until tomorrow during this time. Hint: I doubt if there will be a time tomorrow because you will learn quickly that it is exhausting and totally non-productive to worry.
4. Find a more productive alternative to worry. I suggest talking to God. Hand off your worries to him, then use your time working on things you can change. Clean out a closet, or wash the car. Come to my website, www.DebtProofLiving.com, where you will find thousands of people who are doing something proactive about their financial situations. Join our community of people who are getting their financial lives turned around. Spend some time in the archives reading and learning all you can about saving, giving and spending less than you earn without sacrificing the quality of your life.
Don’t worry. Be happy!
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